Oh, boy, did I just have a breakthrough!
Confession: I am a perfectionist… in EVERYTHING.
My art, my crafts, my daughter, my relationships, any task I undertake… everything. If it doesn’t go how I see it going in my head, then I throw my hands up and say “Oh well!” or worse.
I have gotten so out of practice with drawing and painting that I get frustrated when it doesn’t look the way I pictured it. This is why I have a few paintings that are unfinished and why I have thrown out many, many, MANY sketches and drawings… because they weren’t PERFECT.
With my daughter, (this could just be every parent’s dilemma) if she doesn’t listen and follow instructions, or she doesn’t follow them the way I think she should, then I tend to get frustrated.
Relationships. If he’s not how I pictured “him” to be or it doesn’t go or feel the way I think it should be, then I back away.
Then there’s the whole list of “others”. Decorating, cleaning, organizing, various business ventures, social groups, anything really. If I can’t find THE best way to do it, or if isn’t coming together how I had hoped, or it just doesn’t seem to be working, I can get frustrated and sometimes quit.
Maybe this should be part of my new year’s resolutions… Let go of perfection.
I’m sure I’m the only one who has this problem (insert sarcasm), but it’s definitely something that needs to change. Being a perfectionist is really quite miserable.
Being a perfectionist keeps me from freely creating. It teaches perfectionism to my daughter, and so she grows up thinking that everything has to be done just so or it isn’t good enough. Oh, and she is far too much like me already! Just tonight she had a meltdown because the syrup had slipped off the top of her pancake. Tears and screaming over a freakin’ pancake!!!! My perfectionism also keeps me from having what could be a great and lasting relationship just because it’s not how I thought it would be. It keeps me from other activities that could be great and fulfilling too.
A book I ordered came in the mail today, and it just might be perfect timing.
For awhile now I’ve seen zentangle things, especially on Instagram. I’ve wanted to do them, dabbled with them a bit, but that ugly perfectionism took over and made me dislike anything I did. Sometime last Summer I bought a creative doodling book that has helped some. Then today my “One Zentangle A Day” book came in. It has a “6-week course in creative drawing for relaxation, inspiration, and fun.” Is that what I need or what?! PERFECT! haha
I’m hoping that the exercises in the book will help me to relax and will free up my mind to be more creative and carefree in my work, and to not be such a stinkin’ perfectionist. No eraser. None. Just going to draw.
So is it just me? Anyone else a horrible perfectionist? If you’ve recovered from perfectionism, how did you do it?! Help us!! lol