It has been about four years since my husband left, and I’ve been in a few relationships, been on some dates – most of them ending badly. I thought maybe the dating world has changed, but I’m thinking it’s more that my perspective on dating has changed. One HUGE factor is that prior to my divorce I had never dated as a mother. In case you missed it when I said it before, this is HUGE! Changes the rules completely! I’m not just looking out for little ol’ me anymore. I’ve got a mini-me to consider too.

Before my divorce, the last time I dated was when I was 23, just out of college. Maybe it’s just me, but when I first started dating again, that was the age group I seemed interested in. Maybe it’s because that’s where I last remembered dating. I soon discovered though, that this age group was no longer suitable for me. I was a mom now and this age group, for the most part, was not able to handle it well.

When I got into dating men my own age or older, the question of “He’s 32 and never been married & has no kids? What the heck is wrong with him?!” came into play, further complicating the dating thing. As a single mom trying to date, I also get a lot of “advice” from others – “Don’t let him meet your kid right away” (not always easy to avoid), “Is he well-established?”, “Will your kids get along?”, “Does he want more kids?”, “Don’t move too fast.” It’s almost nauseating.

So after another dating fail, a friend caught me in an emotionally distraught state and talked me into creating an online profile on New Year’s Eve. Eek! I had never done online dating before and had sworn I never would. So much for that. But as a work-from-home mom, with no family around and not being from the area, it seemed I had little options.

I wasn’t about to do one of those sites where you have to pay to set up a profile or send messages or whatever. It was embarrassing enough to create a profile.  Paying for the services just seemed like prostitution, so I found a free one. Probably not the way to go…

Some of the guys on there looked like they were on drugs (probably were) or just out of prison (probably were). Many of them seemed to just want an “intimate encounter”. Umm, no thanks, Mr. Herpes, I’ll pass. Let me tell ya about some of the photos I saw on there, because some of them were really entertaining. I took my own to give you some examples, because I’m just that awesome.

First we have the infamous “bathroom mirror reflection” photo, not smiling because that’s too friendly:

Then we have the “from below, nostril” shot. Please, someone tell me why this is a good photo to put on a dating profile… or ANYWHERE!
Then there’s the “kissy face”. Yes, I saw photos of men making kissy face photos. Not pretty.


I cannot tell you how many profiles had half-naked men. I’m not sure some of them even owned shirts, and they were very proud of their muscles. I’m not going to post a shirtless photo, but I’ll post something similar… saw these photos too. Seriously.


I also saw a lot of “look how cool I am with x-amount of alcoholic beverages near me.” Since I don’t have any of those photos, I’ll give you the “I’m taking a photo in the bathroom mirror but trying to look like I’m having a good time and am a supercool person… by myself” photo.
Oh, but that’s not all! We have the “laying down, I’m seductive, picture me in bed” photo.


This is actually a cute photo of me! lol
Then you have to have a somewhat sideshot:


I noticed that men tend not to smile in photos. I also noticed that there are some man-childs out there. It was really pretty depressing. Although, I did have 3 “marriage proposals” and several offers for sexual encounters in my first 24 hours on the online dating scene. I even had a proposition from a 62-year-old man. 62!!!! A few of them on there seem normal, but most of them seem crazy, so I’m not doing it anymore. It amazes me how many people put up photos of their kids too. That just doesn’t seem smart to me.
Here are a couple of extra photos, just for fun.


Have you ever,or would you ever, try online dating?

Dating Horrors!
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Optimistic Existentialist

As someone who also hasn't re-enterd the dating game since my ex and I parted ways, I definitely feel your pain! I know there are some really nice and wonderful women that I would be interested in dating but how does one get back in the dating world after so long out of it? The pictures you posted cracked me up! The obligatory bathroom mirror shot…why do people find that appealing? Great post!


It is definitely not easy… I really don't get the bathroom shot. On the dating site, some of the bathroom shots had toilets and urinals in the background. Nothing sexier than a urinal. lol

Optimistic Existentialist

Nice pictures by the way 🙂


Thank you! 🙂

the best part of my day...

Been there….still doing that. It's a crapshoot every single time. But it remains one of the only ways to meet men these day. Sad really…enjoying your blog, BTW.


It is quite unfortunate that online dating seems the primary means of meeting someone these days. It's the whole overtaking of social media that's done it.

Thank you for reading! I'm glad you like it. 🙂